Cross Creek Blogs

I would like to speak directly to my experience of Cross Creek Manor regarding their use of consequences.   

First of all, it has been my experience and I have learned that being truly accountable for your actions, often times requires appropriate consequences.  Knowing what these consequences are, will also help a person when making their choices.  THAT is how the use of consequences is used by Cross Creek Manor.  Every teen there knows what the rules are, what is required of them to learn and grow, what acceptable behavior is and what isn’t, and what it will take to “graduate” the program and live in a healthy, working manner.  While the rules themselves are strict and may seem “over the top” from the outside, when you realize these teens come from an environment where “rules are made to be broken” and “everything is negotiable”, this is the 1^st in the foundation to creating positive change.  When adults jump in and try to manage the situation and/or mitigate the consequence, then the teens have won!  Their manipulative behavior is reinforced.  I have not found ANY of the consequences to be overly harsh or punitive.  And it has been my experience that Cross Creek Manor maintains consistency regarding the use of these consequences.  This is the MOST critical part of any agreement.   

If a child loses privileges, drops in their levels, or even requires transfer to a different facility, it should not come as any surprise to them.  THEY make that choice, no one else.  They learn to be accountable for their behaviors and choices this way.  They would NOT be in this specialized environment if they already led an accountable life.   

It has been my experience that no teen has been transferred from Cross Creek Manor other than to:

• Protect the teen
• Protect the other teens
• Facilitate a more appropriate treatment plan

And it has been my experience that the parents are always involved in the decision.  For any teen to be crying “unfair treatment”, “wrongfully consequenced” or worse yet, “abused” is beyond my comprehension.  I have never known the staff of Cross Creek Manor to be anything other than loving, caring and always looking out for the teens’ best interest!   

My daughter was at Cross Creek Manor for 20 months.  In that time, trust me, she made her share of “non-working” choices and received appropriate consequences that ALL helped make her the wonderful, accountable, honest, respectful young leader she is today!  Thank God for Cross Creek and their ability to offer consistent, appropriate and fair consequences when I was not able to!   

My daughter was there because she was making life choices that would eventually KILL her!  Taking away her privileges seems the least impactful part of this whole process.  She learned to live a clean and sober life by placing limits on her own behavior and being accountable for everything she does.  I believe this program saved my daughter’s life and so does she! 

Posted on February 12th, 2008 by admin
Filed under: PARENTS